he hates when Crayak takes him to his bed
The Mockingbird doesn’t care. He didn’t care the first time and he doesn’t care now. It’s just another
endless night. he hates it when the king takes him slowly, holds him down just to be gentle, just to force him to acknowledge every touch, every feeling, every moment that he wants it, and hates himself and the world for it
Erek cares. Erek is a fool. That’s why he always tries, without fail, to kiss him like it means something, to run his fingers softly through his hair. The Mockingbird has had enough of that. He bites his lover to remind him who he is, bends his fingers back if they touch him too carefully.
he hates it when the king whispers in his ear, sweet poisoned nothings that he has to swallow because Crayak holds the strings to everything he is
"Shut up and stop treating me like Zak," the Mockingbird snaps at Erek when the Sidhe forgets himself, every time.
he hates that the only place he consistently sleeps is in the King’s bed, where he dreams vividly of stabbing Crayak through the heart with a dagger made of ice
Erek always wants an afterglow. The Mockingbird has only scattered shadows to offer him, and keeps them for himself anyway.
when Crayak says “Tell me you want it” the Mockingbird asks “How much?”